Yes indeedy, this is the film that changed everything for me. At first I was reluctant to even give it a go. But after hearing my husband babble on and on about it, I decided to make it work for me. "Alright I'll go see your bloody film, you fleet-footed minion, but only if you'll watch one of my favorite movies. His response was quick and panicked. "The Princess Bride, again?", he cried, as he quickly backed away from me with a look of dread on his face. Oh was this ever going to be fun.
We went to the theater, and I prepared myself for a nice long nap, until I saw this, this... extraordinary human being. This, this...manliest man of all men. This beautifully magnificent specimen that I could not take my eyes off of. I couldn't look away. I began to drool into my extra buttered popcorn. Breathing became difficult. Honestly, would it kill theaters in this day and age to serve popcorn in a brown paper bag for those of us who like to eat said popcorn and hyperventilate simultaneously?
Alas, the film ended and we began our walk back to our car in the parking lot.
Hubby: So did you like it?
Me: (complete and utter silence, trying to figure out why my legs won't hold me up)
Hubby: Honey?
Me: Popcorn needs a brown bag so I can breathe....~mumble, mumble, something unintelligible~....
Hubby: Okay so I guess you hated it.
Me: What? No, no you pox-eaten cur, I loved it! It was...sigh....lovely.
Hubby: Lovely? A war movie?
Me: (breathlessly)...Yes.
Hubby: I don't understand you sometimes.
Me: I know that, you silly stupid man. Now let's go home and have sex.
Hubby: (car screeches out of the parking lot)
A few nights pass and....
Hubby: Well the babysitter is good to go. Want to go see a movie?
Me: (nonchalantly) If you insist.
Hubby: What do you want to see?
Me: Mm. Whatever. Any suggestions?
Hubby: (nonchalantly) Not particularly.
We wait a beat while we stare at one another, each knowing what the other is about to say.
Both: Wanna go see 300?
Hysterical teenage laughter ensues, and when we realize that it's us, we run out to see the 8:00 show and are back home by 10:30 where the carnal festivities commence. On and on it went, to the point where we started to look something like:
So what does it all mean?
a- Gerard Butler movies are a surefire way for hubby to get sex.
b -Gerard Butler movies are a surefire way for me to get hubby to watch The Princess Bride...again.
c- Gerard Butler movies are a surefire way for me to get to see my favorite films AND get sex.
That being said, I've never been happier contributing to the box office success of a film and believe that the profits made by all those involved with this project were due in part to the amount of money hubby and I went to go see repeat performances, particluarly between oh I'd say April 19th to April 22nd. I can't imagine what life will be like when the DVD is released and honestly hope they come with one of these:
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