Did you know that the definition of "Smokin'" is not in the dictionary? I had to make one up all by my creative - and modest - self. Why? Because with all the slang that the world has incorporated over the years (including the word "ho" for jebus sake and ridiculous words that can be combined to form sentences like 'Yo foos, whaz the haps?') no one has ever considered including the word "smokin' " in the official dictionary. Ever! It should be in there dammit - with a huge ass picture of The Gerry right next to it.
Not to mention that when I typed the word in their website search engine, they kindly gave me "suggestions" so as to spare my feelings. Like directing me to the definition of "smockings" is going to make everything all better. Not unless I'm an 8 year old little girl getting dressed on Easter Sunday in my big poofy dress. That's when I realized that Merriam and Webster are asses. Dead asses.
So then I decided to try using a general web based search engine to see what forms of the word smokin' I could come up with. The best they could do for me was:
By the time I was done finding nothing, I had a crick in my neck, my left eye was twicthing and I had visions of strangling my dictionary till it choked on it's words. Get it? LOLapalooza.
So I'm done. No more asking Jeeves. No more googling - my days of reading through crap to get to the good stuff are over. I'm making up my own damn dictionary for the Gerry and you can bet your precious Gerry loving hearts that the words Merriam and Webster will not be in there!
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